Sometimes, I wonder what the drug companies would do if people started using more natural/alternative medicines. I mean seriously… what would they do? The feeling I have right now is pretty similar to the feeling I had the morning after I put Bentonite Clay on my daughter's brown recluse bite. Shock. Awe. Amazement. And, admittedly, a bit of disbelief.
Some alternatives to modern medicine I judge much too soon. Others simply gross me out and I'm unwilling to try them. While Essential Oils don't gross me out, I always thought they were a bit too… voodoo. Like "smelly stuff can't possibly heal or treat anything". But I kept hearing people in the "crunchy" community rave about oils and how well they worked.
I've been sick just about every other week for the past 3 months. Sinus pressure, sore throat, coughing, sneezing…the usual "cold weather" ailments. I've tried a few medications, and they treat the symptoms, but they don't treat the problem. I also am very limited on the medications I can take because I am still nursing. When this last bout of misery kicked in, I decided it can't hurt to try.
As luck would have it, someone posted that they were putting in an order for some oils. A few quick messages later a bottle of Thieves Oil from Young Living Essential Oils was on it's way. It couldn't get here fast enough. I had that awful combination sickness. The one where you wake up almost OK, but as the day goes on your head gains 15 pounds, and by bed time you can't breathe. Or sleep. Or function. You can blow your nose all you want, no matter how much comes out, there's more waiting to take it's place. You might as well have gills, because your nose no longer functions.
I managed to survive 6 additional people staying in my house (hopefully none of them got sick… my kids seem to be just fine), 2 massive cakes, and my son's first birthday party. By the time the last guest left yesterday, I was an autopilot zombie. I'm not going to lie, I can't even remember the last time I showered. It was BAD. I was so tired that I picked up the oil around 3 and forgot about it until 8:30. Maybe it was the skepticism, but I'm pretty sure it was just pure exhaustion.
I applied the oil as instructed and sat back down, noting my new scent was almost like Vicks, but stronger. Wait a second…scent? I could smell! Both nostrils have been mortared shut for days, and still were, but I could smell! Fifteen minutes later, there was a massive pressure release as one nostril cleared. Fifteen minutes later, the other cleared. I went to bed breathing! It was a good feeling, especially since night-time is usually miserable.
This morning, I'm still a tad congested, and there's the faintest twinge of pain when I swallow, but we are leaps and bounds from this time yesterday. Could it be coincidence? Sure. Think that if you wish. But I'm a believer. I'll be doing a lot more research into Essential Oils to see what else I've been missing out on!
Tuesday, February 4, 2014
Monday, January 27, 2014
A Beautiful Mosaic
Crunchy. Instinctive. Attachment. Helicopter. Authoritative. Permissive. Scrunchy. Have you ever been confused at just how many parenting styles there are? I know I have been. It's even more confusing when you are trying desperately to fit a mold and find other parents with the same values and styles. I finally came to a simple conclusion the other day: I have a Mosaic parenting style. I'm pretty sure almost every single one of you does, as well.
What is Mosaic? Exactly what it sounds like it is. It's bits and pieces of every type of parenting style there is. Named or not. With it's own book series or never heard of. Debated on mid-day talk shows. Criticized on the evening news. There's so much judgement and prejudice in the parenting community about what is the right or wrong style or what is going to harm your child for life… They should sleep on their tummies-they should sleep on their backs, don't give them a pacifier-pacifiers reduce the risk of SIDS, put the baby down or they will not learn to self soothe-hold the baby or they will feel abandoned… I could go on for HOURS! While I have opinions on every single one of these issues (and so many more), I don't feel like all of my opinions match a set style. And why should they? It's parenting.
So I'm going to be posting based on what issues arise in the day-to-day life of staying at home raising a 2.5 year old and a (almost) 1 year old. I'm going to write transparent, honest blogs with my opinions… and if you don't agree, that's OK! That's the point. We are all here creating our own Mommy (or Daddy!) Mosaic!
Tuesday, October 15, 2013
Pregnancy, Stillborn, and Infant Loss Remembrance Day
Tonight, like so many other moms and dads around the world, I lit a candle.
We were married young. I was 19, he was almost 22. We were (are) SO in love. It didn't take long for us to find out we were expecting our first baby. We called EVERYONE. I'll never forget admiring the look on my husband's face as he was calling family to tell him the good news. He was glowing.
May 25, 2009. I woke up to some slight bleeding. I texted one of my mommy-friends to make sure it was normal, but since everything else felt fine I went about my day. We planned to head to the beach since it was Memorial Day and Adam was off from work. On the way out there, she texted me back "That's not normal, go to the hospital"
Almost like a switch was flipped with that message, the cramps hit. They came in waves...like contractions. Every few minutes I was rendered immobile with the worst pain I've ever felt. I remember curling up in the fetal position in the waiting room chair and just knowing our baby was gone. It was horrific.
Since we had already called everyone, we had to start making the calls again. They were not fun. My Daddy had sent a mass email out telling each family member what they would be to the new baby. Through cracking voice and rolling tears, I asked him to tell his side of the family for me. I couldn't take repeating the heartbreak over and over and over. It was the single worst day of my life.
We lost an estimated 4 pregnancies following that loss. There were positive tests 4 separate times, then a few days later the miscarriage process began all over again. As horrible as it seems, I tried not to get attached. There were times I didn't even take a test fearing the loss would come soon after. We will never know the real number, but the first caused enough pain for all of them. No woman should have to endure that pain, but 1 in 4 does.
My amazing fertility doctor ran every test possible. A year and a half later, the best answer she could come up with for the recurring spontaneous miscarriages was that the first baby we lost was significantly further along than the estimated 6 weeks and I should have been given a D & C. The remaining scar tissue prevented further embryos from properly implanting, so they were miscarried shortly after. It was a hard pill to swallow, but it made sense.
As for the cause of the first miscarriage... we will never know. It was explained to me that many times the mother's body recognizes chromosomal abnormalities in the developing baby and does not allow the pregnancy to progress further. I take comfort in the fact that our baby has a better "life" than we could have given her (or him...for some reason I always pictured her as a girl...even had a name picked out) here on earth. Many of these miscarriages happen before the mother even knows she is pregnant and therefore go unnoticed. As many as 10-25% of pregnancies end in miscarriage.
Our story is like so many others. My heart goes out to all mommies with Angel Babies. Even more to those who were able to see their sweet baby's face. You are not alone. I hope you can speak about your loss and find comfort in knowing that you will see your baby again. I'm glad that my Rainbow Babies have Guardian Angel Babies watching over them <3
Tuesday, February 5, 2013
I Declined an Epidural
I'm not sure if this will help anyone or not. But I'm going to put it out there anyway for all those Mommies who can't decide if an epidural is right for them or not. Here is the story of my two deliveries. With my first, I opted for an epidural. My second I chose no epidural. I don't regret either decision, nor will I feel guilty about either of my choices! I hope this gives you something to think about!
My mindset going into my first delivery was NOT to have a birthplan. I was prepared for anything and everything to happen. I knew that if I set a birthplan, all hell would break loose and I would become upset if any little thing strayed from the plan.
That being said, I always said I wanted to "try" to go without an epidural, but wasn't going to feel bad if I couldn't.
I woke up at 5:26 am with contractions that were 2 minutes apart. Being an expert on childbirth (I watch TLC "A Baby Story" all the time... expert status! lol), I decided to get in the shower and see if they stayed consistent or went away-I was ready for the long labor, trying to walk the baby out and pushing for hours. When my husband came to check on me a bit later the contractions were still coming 2 minutes apart, but they were also tolerable. No biggie.
I took my time getting dressed. I may have even dried my hair, I don't remember. We left the house for the hospital and I started vomiting with each contraction. EW. I hate vomiting worse than anything. By the time we got to the hospital I was STILL vomiting with each contraction.
Long story short it took FOREVER for them to come in the room and check me, but once they did my room became a circus. I was dilated to 8 cm. I was still vomiting with each contraction when the Midwife looked at me and said "What's your plan for pain???"... Um... "What are my options?"...."At this point? Epidural." ... "Give it to me"
I just wanted to stop vomiting. The pain was still tolerable. But in my mind, if I didn't get the epidural I would be too busy puking all over the place to see or hold my baby, or worse I would puke on her. I know it sounds crazy, but those are the thoughts of a laboring woman.
Getting the epidural was a piece of cake. It hurt, don't get me wrong, but I was contracting the entire time so I was more focused on getting through the contraction and staying still than the pain of the epidural.
It took a few minutes for the epidural to kick in, and about 15 seconds after it kicked in I felt like I needed to poop. If you've had a baby, you know what I'm talking about. If you haven't, believe me. You are going to feel like you have to poop. I told my nurse I needed to go to the bathroom. That was the only sensation I had. No pain. Just pressure like I was about to embarrass myself in front of a complete stranger and my husband. She simply said "Oh, honey, that's not what that is" and pressed a magic button that made every staff member on the floor suddenly rush into my room for delivery.
Literally within a minute my daughter was born at 10:44 am. I never made a conscious effort to push. My stomach just knotted up and did the work for me. There was a *slight* burning sensation, but mostly all I felt was pressure.
The most painful part of my first delivery was actually AFTER delivery when I had to be stitched. 6 stitches. Worst pain of my life up until that point. THAT was awful. Thanks to the epidural, my actual delivery was relatively pain free.
Recovery on the other hand was not fun. My legs were numb for quite some time. I was VERY very sore for I don't know how long afterwards. I needed help in and out of bed and didn't have the energy to shower until the second day after delivery. I thought all of these things were just normal after having had a baby. I didn't know the difference... until 5 days ago (almost 2 years after my first delivery)
If you noticed the two times I mentioned above, my first delivery was only 5 hours from start to finish. It was very quick. I spent very little time in the hospital. It was NOT the hours of walking and pushing and pain that I was prepared for courtesy of "Reality" TV. It was beautiful and an amazing experience, but not what I expected.
Because my labor was so quick, my doctor this time around prepared me from the get go that I might not be able to get an epidural. I just mentally prepared myself for a very fast, painful labor. I actually prepared myself for a slow painful labor, because that would be my luck.
With this delivery, I was admitted at 35 weeks 5 days in an attempt to stop contractions overnight. It didn't work. The next morning at 7 am I was dilated to 7 cm. My water was broken and I was asked if I wanted an epidural. "I'm going to try to go without, but no promises"... brave, brave soul.
I did go without. I didn't have a choice. I may have had a choice earlier, but there was only 15 minutes or so between when I started feeling really intense contractions and when I delivered. It was FAST.
With this delivery I also felt pressure, but it wasn't like I needed to poop. I began to feel it about 15 minutes before I delivered. With every contraction, I could feel my son's head moving down and my pelvis spreading. It is the weirdest, most painful feeling. OK, not the MOST painful of the whole experience, but it hurt.
As I was being wheeled into the delivery room I got a whole new sensation. Burning, MASSIVE pressure. WAY more than needing to poop. It was more like having a huge, uncomfortable mass tearing open your vagina and the harder you pushed the faster it would be over. At least that's how I felt. I was being TOLD not to push, but my body disagreed and pushed anyway. It was completely involuntary just like the first time. The massive burning and pressure continued even as the nurse said "OK, head's out"... I did NOT feel his head come out. I could not tell the difference. I did feel a massive release of pressure as the rest of his body came out.
That was the best feeling in the world. As SOON as his body was out, I was no longer in pain. I was exhausted. My heart was beating a mile a minute. But I wasn't in pain. And I hadn't torn (YAY!)
As far as recovery, this time around was SIMPLE. I immediately felt like I could get up and move around. I was a little sore, of course. If I laid down for too long I got stiff. But recovery was a breeze. It's now four days after delivery and if I hadn't been there I wouldn't believe I had a baby just 4 days ago. I feel normal. Of course I'm bleeding, but that's about it. Easy easy easy.
I feel like I need to reiterate how FAST my deliveries were. Both times my kids were out within a single contraction. There was no "push for 10 seconds". There was no voluntary pushing at all. Both times I was urged to STOP pushing. If you have long labors, this whole post was probably a waste of your time. But maybe not.
The major differences between having an epidural vs. not having one are obviously the amount of pain you are willing to tolerate and (in my opinion) recovery time. My next delivery I will once again decline an epidural. The few minutes of intense pain is worth it to be able to recover so quickly. Not to mention the pride in knowing what you just accomplished all by yourself.
The body is an amazing thing. Modern medicine is also amazing. You can pretty much have the birth experience you desire (as long as everything goes smoothly). I hope this post helped someone in their decision, or maybe informed you a little bit more about what to expect! I know that no 2 births are the same. All I can do is share my experiences and hope they help you in some way or another!
Happy pushing!
My mindset going into my first delivery was NOT to have a birthplan. I was prepared for anything and everything to happen. I knew that if I set a birthplan, all hell would break loose and I would become upset if any little thing strayed from the plan.
That being said, I always said I wanted to "try" to go without an epidural, but wasn't going to feel bad if I couldn't.
I woke up at 5:26 am with contractions that were 2 minutes apart. Being an expert on childbirth (I watch TLC "A Baby Story" all the time... expert status! lol), I decided to get in the shower and see if they stayed consistent or went away-I was ready for the long labor, trying to walk the baby out and pushing for hours. When my husband came to check on me a bit later the contractions were still coming 2 minutes apart, but they were also tolerable. No biggie.
I took my time getting dressed. I may have even dried my hair, I don't remember. We left the house for the hospital and I started vomiting with each contraction. EW. I hate vomiting worse than anything. By the time we got to the hospital I was STILL vomiting with each contraction.
Long story short it took FOREVER for them to come in the room and check me, but once they did my room became a circus. I was dilated to 8 cm. I was still vomiting with each contraction when the Midwife looked at me and said "What's your plan for pain???"... Um... "What are my options?"...."At this point? Epidural." ... "Give it to me"
I just wanted to stop vomiting. The pain was still tolerable. But in my mind, if I didn't get the epidural I would be too busy puking all over the place to see or hold my baby, or worse I would puke on her. I know it sounds crazy, but those are the thoughts of a laboring woman.
Getting the epidural was a piece of cake. It hurt, don't get me wrong, but I was contracting the entire time so I was more focused on getting through the contraction and staying still than the pain of the epidural.
It took a few minutes for the epidural to kick in, and about 15 seconds after it kicked in I felt like I needed to poop. If you've had a baby, you know what I'm talking about. If you haven't, believe me. You are going to feel like you have to poop. I told my nurse I needed to go to the bathroom. That was the only sensation I had. No pain. Just pressure like I was about to embarrass myself in front of a complete stranger and my husband. She simply said "Oh, honey, that's not what that is" and pressed a magic button that made every staff member on the floor suddenly rush into my room for delivery.
Literally within a minute my daughter was born at 10:44 am. I never made a conscious effort to push. My stomach just knotted up and did the work for me. There was a *slight* burning sensation, but mostly all I felt was pressure.
The most painful part of my first delivery was actually AFTER delivery when I had to be stitched. 6 stitches. Worst pain of my life up until that point. THAT was awful. Thanks to the epidural, my actual delivery was relatively pain free.
Recovery on the other hand was not fun. My legs were numb for quite some time. I was VERY very sore for I don't know how long afterwards. I needed help in and out of bed and didn't have the energy to shower until the second day after delivery. I thought all of these things were just normal after having had a baby. I didn't know the difference... until 5 days ago (almost 2 years after my first delivery)
If you noticed the two times I mentioned above, my first delivery was only 5 hours from start to finish. It was very quick. I spent very little time in the hospital. It was NOT the hours of walking and pushing and pain that I was prepared for courtesy of "Reality" TV. It was beautiful and an amazing experience, but not what I expected.
Because my labor was so quick, my doctor this time around prepared me from the get go that I might not be able to get an epidural. I just mentally prepared myself for a very fast, painful labor. I actually prepared myself for a slow painful labor, because that would be my luck.
With this delivery, I was admitted at 35 weeks 5 days in an attempt to stop contractions overnight. It didn't work. The next morning at 7 am I was dilated to 7 cm. My water was broken and I was asked if I wanted an epidural. "I'm going to try to go without, but no promises"... brave, brave soul.
I did go without. I didn't have a choice. I may have had a choice earlier, but there was only 15 minutes or so between when I started feeling really intense contractions and when I delivered. It was FAST.
With this delivery I also felt pressure, but it wasn't like I needed to poop. I began to feel it about 15 minutes before I delivered. With every contraction, I could feel my son's head moving down and my pelvis spreading. It is the weirdest, most painful feeling. OK, not the MOST painful of the whole experience, but it hurt.
As I was being wheeled into the delivery room I got a whole new sensation. Burning, MASSIVE pressure. WAY more than needing to poop. It was more like having a huge, uncomfortable mass tearing open your vagina and the harder you pushed the faster it would be over. At least that's how I felt. I was being TOLD not to push, but my body disagreed and pushed anyway. It was completely involuntary just like the first time. The massive burning and pressure continued even as the nurse said "OK, head's out"... I did NOT feel his head come out. I could not tell the difference. I did feel a massive release of pressure as the rest of his body came out.
That was the best feeling in the world. As SOON as his body was out, I was no longer in pain. I was exhausted. My heart was beating a mile a minute. But I wasn't in pain. And I hadn't torn (YAY!)
As far as recovery, this time around was SIMPLE. I immediately felt like I could get up and move around. I was a little sore, of course. If I laid down for too long I got stiff. But recovery was a breeze. It's now four days after delivery and if I hadn't been there I wouldn't believe I had a baby just 4 days ago. I feel normal. Of course I'm bleeding, but that's about it. Easy easy easy.
I feel like I need to reiterate how FAST my deliveries were. Both times my kids were out within a single contraction. There was no "push for 10 seconds". There was no voluntary pushing at all. Both times I was urged to STOP pushing. If you have long labors, this whole post was probably a waste of your time. But maybe not.
The major differences between having an epidural vs. not having one are obviously the amount of pain you are willing to tolerate and (in my opinion) recovery time. My next delivery I will once again decline an epidural. The few minutes of intense pain is worth it to be able to recover so quickly. Not to mention the pride in knowing what you just accomplished all by yourself.
The body is an amazing thing. Modern medicine is also amazing. You can pretty much have the birth experience you desire (as long as everything goes smoothly). I hope this post helped someone in their decision, or maybe informed you a little bit more about what to expect! I know that no 2 births are the same. All I can do is share my experiences and hope they help you in some way or another!
Happy pushing!
Monday, February 4, 2013
Introducing: Carson James!!!
Friday morning we welcomed our newest, adorable addition: Carson James Gaskin. He was a little over 4 weeks early... and if I thought Jo was a whirlwind delivery, this one beats hers out by a mile! So heads up, queasy stomachs: this post is going to be all about his arrival.
At 34 weeks I went to my regular pre-natal appointment feeling just off. I told the doctor this and that I had a few random contractions so he decided to check and make sure nothing was going on. I was dilated to 3 cm... which could be a big deal, but I could also go full term this way... very frustrating! The doctor advised that I should be on modified bed rest, not picking up anything over 5 pounds or raising my heart rate. Easier said than done, but I agreed.
Adam called in his mom to come help us (me) out a week later (35 weeks). I was having more and more days where contractions would pick up if I did any little thing. At first I was feeling like I was being babysat, but it truly was the best thing for us. Anita (and her friend) got SO much done that I just couldn't do by myself: the Christmas tree was put away, house was clean, dishes were done, meals were made, kids room was readied... they even went to Wal-Mart and bought diapers and blankets for our new "Little Man"... and not a day too soon!
35 weeks and 4 days. I was still in bed feeling some pretty rough contractions (about 2 minutes apart, lasting one minute, for 30 minutes), so I texted Anita "Can you come get Jo?" She was at WalMart so I ended up getting up and packing a hospital bag (at which point the contractions disappeared...go figure). I decided to call the doctor anyway and they asked me to come in an hour later just to be on the safe side. I got myself and Jo dressed and started cleaning up a little bit. They came home shortly after I started sorting some laundry... notice I said "started sorting". I couldn't finish. The contractions picked back up just in time for me to head to the doctor. Fun.
I'm very grateful that Anita and her friend were there so I could leave Jo at home with them while I went for what I was sure was going to be a waste of time. I showed up and waited half an hour (I was a work-in, so I wasn't upset about that) with zero contractions in the waiting room... needless to say I felt like an idiot for being there. When I finally saw the doctor he determined I was dilated to a "loose 4"... which means there were "changes"... Again, I could go into full blown labor any time or I could stay this way for the next 4 and a half weeks... who knew... but he asked me to go to labor and delivery for overnight observation and antibiotics just to be safe since I have a "history" of a fast labor. No problem. I called Adam and let him know where I would be, then called Anita as well.
I found my way over to L&D (I hadn't even determined where it was yet, since I thought I had 4.5 more weeks to go... shame on me) and was informed that they didn't have a bed available, so I was told to wait in the waiting room. More than that: I couldn't eat. I hadn't eaten since the night before and wasn't feeling well that morning, but now I was starving and was given ice chips. Yay. Add on the fact that I had to be in a waiting room full of nervous families and I was not thrilled. Aaaaannnnnnndddddddd cue contractions. Glorious.
They got a bed shortly (thank goodness) after...around 3 pm. I settled in for what I thought was going to be a long night. It was. Contractions picked up and were uncomfortable... but only to the point of being obnoxious. It's worse when you are just laying alone in a hospital bed with some ice chips. I hung out with some awful hospital television until 5 when Adam came to keep me company and sneak me some Oreos, fudge, and mashed potatoes (gotta love a man that will sneak you food!) Around shift change at 7 pm a new nurse came in and said that my doctor requested I be checked. Cool. I was still at 4... at least they *think* there was no change. Apparently it's subjective between each person checking you... but either way there was no DRASTIC change. I was, however, contracting pretty steadily, so the doctor decided to put me on a drug called Brethine on top of the antibiotics (Ampicillin, since I hadn't had a group B Strep test done yet) I was getting through the IV. Brethine is supposed to help stop contractions. It did a pretty good job. Adam left to go home and help with Jo/sleep, and I was able to get a little sleep (as much as possible in the uncomfortable labor bed) after he left since the Brethine had reduced contractions to a slight tightening in my stomach every few minutes.
35 weeks 5 days. Adam went to work the next morning (Friday). I was sure I was going to be sent home since the Brethine had reduced contractions pretty well. My doctor came in right at 7 am to check me and see what we got accomplished overnight. The nurse made a comment about how the Brethine had done it's job so I was running through where I wanted to go pick up breakfast on my way home (still starving). Not so fast.
Much to my surprise (and my doctor's and nurse's as well!), I was dilated to 7. Good thing he decided to keep me in the hospital! He broke my water and called for labs to be done so I could get pain meds if I so chose. This baby was determined to come early. At that point all we could do was pray the antibiotics would protect him from infection and pray that he was developed enough to breath on his own.
My cell phone was plugged in in the bathroom, and since they had already broken my water I wasn't going to get up and cause a mess... I waited for the lab tech who came to draw my labs to finish and nicely asked her if she could get my phone so I could tell my husband we were having a baby. She was nice enough to grab it for me.
"Hey, babe. Where are you?" "About to get on 65...why?" "You might want to turn around. I'm at 7. They broke my water" "On my way" Thank God he was still in town.
Of course contractions picked up. They didn't get bad until about 9:00. I called the nurse and told her there was "pressure"-for those of you who had medicated deliveries or have not had kids..."pressure" means you can feel the baby's head coming through your freaking pelvis. Every single contraction I could feel him get lower and lower. And that scared the crap out of me. The nurse, however, acted un-concerned. She said "Oh, you are still 8-9... it will be a little bit longer". I don't know what it was that made her check once more... maybe the face I made with the next contraction... or maybe I even said something to her... ***again, this is gross. Stop reading if this stuff grosses you out cuz it's about to get nasty***... whatever it was, she checked again and said "hang on, let me see if I can move this little lip of cervix out of the way so he can come on down." And she did just that. Hooked her finger under my cervix and moved it out of the way. OOOOWWWWWW. ow. As soon as she did that, I could feel him REALLY coming. She yelled out the door "I need help in here! We are moving! Somebody page Dr. Plessala and tell him to come on!" I barely heard Adam say "Do I follow you?"... lol poor guy... "Yes, come on dad"
Another nurse showed up and they wheeled me around a few corners to this terrifyingly white, sanitary, surgery looking room. I'm assuming it doubles as a c-section room when need-be. No sooner than they pushed me through the door than I felt that familiar "holy crap I'm gonna push" feeling. It wasn't that I needed to push... it was that my body just decided it was time to push and did so. I could NOT stop it. The nurse started hollering again "Someone CALL Dr. Plessala and tell him to RUN". Good luck.
Then she started this annoying "No no no no no no no no no" thing. She sounded like a motorcycle trying to start. or dying. or something. I wanted to kick her. And would have if I wasn't trying so hard to STOP pushing. That was the only thing I could think "stop pushing. You have to stop or you are going to tear." I was holding Adam's hand... he swears I wasn't squeezing too hard but I can't imagine I was gentle at that point. I didn't have an epidural. I was feeling EVERYTHING. The nurse then said "pant through it, just pant honey"...I tried that. I'm not sure what it was supposed to do, but it didn't stop the involuntary pushing. At this point there were 3 nurses: the 2 who wheeled me in and were running around like crazy people trying to get things ready, and a baby nurse trying to get a warmer/baby blankets ready. Too late. I'm pretty sure as he was coming out I dropped an F bomb. It didn't even register that he was coming out. It was just massive burning and pressure. Pressure your body automatically pushes through... cuz I couldn't stop it. I heard the nurse stop the "No no no no no no no" thing and say "OK, heads out... it's ok... little push"... as if I had any control over the strength of the pushes either.
It all happened just that fast. He was out, the cord was cut, and the baby nurse immediately took him to make sure he was ok. All I could see was his purple head, but I could hear him breathing/crying and that was a HUGE relief. I was still asking if he was OK. That was all I cared about. She told me his head was purple and bruised from coming down so fast, but that he was doing well. About that time the doctor came in the room. So glad you could join us! It wasn't his fault. He made sure everything was taken care of: delivered the placenta, told me I hadn't torn...and I'm sure other things but I wasn't paying attention. I wanted COLD water and I wanted to hold my baby. That's about it.
I vaguely remember him patting my leg and saying "You did great! When they called me I stopped mid sentence and told my patient 'I know exactly who this is, I have to go!' and ran. I even caught all the elevators... that never happens... I still didn't make it!" When I say delivery only took a few minutes I'm not exaggerating. It was FAST. If I had not been in the hospital, I would NOT have made it.
The "No no no no no no no" nurse said "Well, I haven't had to do that in a LONG time! I haven't delivered a baby in a while!"... then something to the effect of "I've been doing this for 27 years and let me tell you girl, YOU are amazing! THAT was amazing!"... I'm not sure exactly what that means... but I'll take it!
As soon as they established Carson was OK and weighed him, they brought him to me. His head and arm were bruised, and his eyes stayed closed, but he was absolutely perfect! I was SO so relieved that not only was my baby boy HERE, but he was OK. I noticed while he was on the scale that he didn't look like a preemie. He didn't weigh preemie, either. He was a healthy 7 pounds 1 ounce. Lots of people have said "sounds like someone messed up a calculation somewhere!"... no, I promise... his due date of March 3 was EXTREMELY accurate. I'm pretty OCD about having kids and handy with ovulation tests. I'm SURE his due date was the third and all his ultrasounds/measurements confirmed that the entire pregnancy.
The nurses joked about what a monster he would have been if he had gone full term. He was just giving me a break by coming early! Whatever the reason for his early arrival, I'm SO grateful and thankful for his health. He does have a few of the signs of being an early baby: his blood sugar dropped pretty low the first night (due to his lack of "brown fat")... we did have to give him 15 cc of formula but I guess that's not the end of the world. He has been a super nurser since the start-just needed a little blood sugar boost :) He also has a heart murmur caused by two tiny holes in his heart that simply didn't have a chance to close just yet. The pediatrician assured me the holes will close soon and the murmur was already not as prominent by the second day in the hospital. Other than the blood sugar and heart murmur, he has very little fat on his body. He looks like he is swimming in newborn clothes but is too long for preemie clothes. He does need preemie diapers to fit his tiny waist, and his feet are smaller than the preemie socks we (my mom) got him. He has very little hair and is perfect in every single way :)
This delivery was MUCH easier on my body so I am not very sore at all. Though it was incredibly painful for a few brief minutes, it was definitely worth it to go without an epidural. Recovery was very fast and I was up walking around and showering very quickly after delivery.
We got to go home after 48 hours (normal discharge time). Carson has been fantastic the entire time. He is very calm and only cries when he is hungry or when we change his diaper. Kaelyn adores him. She pats his head and says "It's ok!" - it's adorable. She has also started to "help" with diaper changes and pat his back to burp him. Melt my heart. Daddy adores him as well. He sometimes doesn't want to give him back to me after I ask him to hold him <3
We are so thrilled to welcome Carson into our family. He is an adorable little man with the sweetest personality. I can't wait to watch him grow up! It's safe to say, I'm in love <3
At 34 weeks I went to my regular pre-natal appointment feeling just off. I told the doctor this and that I had a few random contractions so he decided to check and make sure nothing was going on. I was dilated to 3 cm... which could be a big deal, but I could also go full term this way... very frustrating! The doctor advised that I should be on modified bed rest, not picking up anything over 5 pounds or raising my heart rate. Easier said than done, but I agreed.
Adam called in his mom to come help us (me) out a week later (35 weeks). I was having more and more days where contractions would pick up if I did any little thing. At first I was feeling like I was being babysat, but it truly was the best thing for us. Anita (and her friend) got SO much done that I just couldn't do by myself: the Christmas tree was put away, house was clean, dishes were done, meals were made, kids room was readied... they even went to Wal-Mart and bought diapers and blankets for our new "Little Man"... and not a day too soon!
35 weeks and 4 days. I was still in bed feeling some pretty rough contractions (about 2 minutes apart, lasting one minute, for 30 minutes), so I texted Anita "Can you come get Jo?" She was at WalMart so I ended up getting up and packing a hospital bag (at which point the contractions disappeared...go figure). I decided to call the doctor anyway and they asked me to come in an hour later just to be on the safe side. I got myself and Jo dressed and started cleaning up a little bit. They came home shortly after I started sorting some laundry... notice I said "started sorting". I couldn't finish. The contractions picked back up just in time for me to head to the doctor. Fun.
I'm very grateful that Anita and her friend were there so I could leave Jo at home with them while I went for what I was sure was going to be a waste of time. I showed up and waited half an hour (I was a work-in, so I wasn't upset about that) with zero contractions in the waiting room... needless to say I felt like an idiot for being there. When I finally saw the doctor he determined I was dilated to a "loose 4"... which means there were "changes"... Again, I could go into full blown labor any time or I could stay this way for the next 4 and a half weeks... who knew... but he asked me to go to labor and delivery for overnight observation and antibiotics just to be safe since I have a "history" of a fast labor. No problem. I called Adam and let him know where I would be, then called Anita as well.
I found my way over to L&D (I hadn't even determined where it was yet, since I thought I had 4.5 more weeks to go... shame on me) and was informed that they didn't have a bed available, so I was told to wait in the waiting room. More than that: I couldn't eat. I hadn't eaten since the night before and wasn't feeling well that morning, but now I was starving and was given ice chips. Yay. Add on the fact that I had to be in a waiting room full of nervous families and I was not thrilled. Aaaaannnnnnndddddddd cue contractions. Glorious.
They got a bed shortly (thank goodness) after...around 3 pm. I settled in for what I thought was going to be a long night. It was. Contractions picked up and were uncomfortable... but only to the point of being obnoxious. It's worse when you are just laying alone in a hospital bed with some ice chips. I hung out with some awful hospital television until 5 when Adam came to keep me company and sneak me some Oreos, fudge, and mashed potatoes (gotta love a man that will sneak you food!) Around shift change at 7 pm a new nurse came in and said that my doctor requested I be checked. Cool. I was still at 4... at least they *think* there was no change. Apparently it's subjective between each person checking you... but either way there was no DRASTIC change. I was, however, contracting pretty steadily, so the doctor decided to put me on a drug called Brethine on top of the antibiotics (Ampicillin, since I hadn't had a group B Strep test done yet) I was getting through the IV. Brethine is supposed to help stop contractions. It did a pretty good job. Adam left to go home and help with Jo/sleep, and I was able to get a little sleep (as much as possible in the uncomfortable labor bed) after he left since the Brethine had reduced contractions to a slight tightening in my stomach every few minutes.
35 weeks 5 days. Adam went to work the next morning (Friday). I was sure I was going to be sent home since the Brethine had reduced contractions pretty well. My doctor came in right at 7 am to check me and see what we got accomplished overnight. The nurse made a comment about how the Brethine had done it's job so I was running through where I wanted to go pick up breakfast on my way home (still starving). Not so fast.
Much to my surprise (and my doctor's and nurse's as well!), I was dilated to 7. Good thing he decided to keep me in the hospital! He broke my water and called for labs to be done so I could get pain meds if I so chose. This baby was determined to come early. At that point all we could do was pray the antibiotics would protect him from infection and pray that he was developed enough to breath on his own.
My cell phone was plugged in in the bathroom, and since they had already broken my water I wasn't going to get up and cause a mess... I waited for the lab tech who came to draw my labs to finish and nicely asked her if she could get my phone so I could tell my husband we were having a baby. She was nice enough to grab it for me.
"Hey, babe. Where are you?" "About to get on 65...why?" "You might want to turn around. I'm at 7. They broke my water" "On my way" Thank God he was still in town.
Of course contractions picked up. They didn't get bad until about 9:00. I called the nurse and told her there was "pressure"-for those of you who had medicated deliveries or have not had kids..."pressure" means you can feel the baby's head coming through your freaking pelvis. Every single contraction I could feel him get lower and lower. And that scared the crap out of me. The nurse, however, acted un-concerned. She said "Oh, you are still 8-9... it will be a little bit longer". I don't know what it was that made her check once more... maybe the face I made with the next contraction... or maybe I even said something to her... ***again, this is gross. Stop reading if this stuff grosses you out cuz it's about to get nasty***... whatever it was, she checked again and said "hang on, let me see if I can move this little lip of cervix out of the way so he can come on down." And she did just that. Hooked her finger under my cervix and moved it out of the way. OOOOWWWWWW. ow. As soon as she did that, I could feel him REALLY coming. She yelled out the door "I need help in here! We are moving! Somebody page Dr. Plessala and tell him to come on!" I barely heard Adam say "Do I follow you?"... lol poor guy... "Yes, come on dad"
Another nurse showed up and they wheeled me around a few corners to this terrifyingly white, sanitary, surgery looking room. I'm assuming it doubles as a c-section room when need-be. No sooner than they pushed me through the door than I felt that familiar "holy crap I'm gonna push" feeling. It wasn't that I needed to push... it was that my body just decided it was time to push and did so. I could NOT stop it. The nurse started hollering again "Someone CALL Dr. Plessala and tell him to RUN". Good luck.
Then she started this annoying "No no no no no no no no no" thing. She sounded like a motorcycle trying to start. or dying. or something. I wanted to kick her. And would have if I wasn't trying so hard to STOP pushing. That was the only thing I could think "stop pushing. You have to stop or you are going to tear." I was holding Adam's hand... he swears I wasn't squeezing too hard but I can't imagine I was gentle at that point. I didn't have an epidural. I was feeling EVERYTHING. The nurse then said "pant through it, just pant honey"...I tried that. I'm not sure what it was supposed to do, but it didn't stop the involuntary pushing. At this point there were 3 nurses: the 2 who wheeled me in and were running around like crazy people trying to get things ready, and a baby nurse trying to get a warmer/baby blankets ready. Too late. I'm pretty sure as he was coming out I dropped an F bomb. It didn't even register that he was coming out. It was just massive burning and pressure. Pressure your body automatically pushes through... cuz I couldn't stop it. I heard the nurse stop the "No no no no no no no" thing and say "OK, heads out... it's ok... little push"... as if I had any control over the strength of the pushes either.
It all happened just that fast. He was out, the cord was cut, and the baby nurse immediately took him to make sure he was ok. All I could see was his purple head, but I could hear him breathing/crying and that was a HUGE relief. I was still asking if he was OK. That was all I cared about. She told me his head was purple and bruised from coming down so fast, but that he was doing well. About that time the doctor came in the room. So glad you could join us! It wasn't his fault. He made sure everything was taken care of: delivered the placenta, told me I hadn't torn...and I'm sure other things but I wasn't paying attention. I wanted COLD water and I wanted to hold my baby. That's about it.
I vaguely remember him patting my leg and saying "You did great! When they called me I stopped mid sentence and told my patient 'I know exactly who this is, I have to go!' and ran. I even caught all the elevators... that never happens... I still didn't make it!" When I say delivery only took a few minutes I'm not exaggerating. It was FAST. If I had not been in the hospital, I would NOT have made it.
The "No no no no no no no" nurse said "Well, I haven't had to do that in a LONG time! I haven't delivered a baby in a while!"... then something to the effect of "I've been doing this for 27 years and let me tell you girl, YOU are amazing! THAT was amazing!"... I'm not sure exactly what that means... but I'll take it!
The nurses joked about what a monster he would have been if he had gone full term. He was just giving me a break by coming early! Whatever the reason for his early arrival, I'm SO grateful and thankful for his health. He does have a few of the signs of being an early baby: his blood sugar dropped pretty low the first night (due to his lack of "brown fat")... we did have to give him 15 cc of formula but I guess that's not the end of the world. He has been a super nurser since the start-just needed a little blood sugar boost :) He also has a heart murmur caused by two tiny holes in his heart that simply didn't have a chance to close just yet. The pediatrician assured me the holes will close soon and the murmur was already not as prominent by the second day in the hospital. Other than the blood sugar and heart murmur, he has very little fat on his body. He looks like he is swimming in newborn clothes but is too long for preemie clothes. He does need preemie diapers to fit his tiny waist, and his feet are smaller than the preemie socks we (my mom) got him. He has very little hair and is perfect in every single way :)
This delivery was MUCH easier on my body so I am not very sore at all. Though it was incredibly painful for a few brief minutes, it was definitely worth it to go without an epidural. Recovery was very fast and I was up walking around and showering very quickly after delivery.
We got to go home after 48 hours (normal discharge time). Carson has been fantastic the entire time. He is very calm and only cries when he is hungry or when we change his diaper. Kaelyn adores him. She pats his head and says "It's ok!" - it's adorable. She has also started to "help" with diaper changes and pat his back to burp him. Melt my heart. Daddy adores him as well. He sometimes doesn't want to give him back to me after I ask him to hold him <3
We are so thrilled to welcome Carson into our family. He is an adorable little man with the sweetest personality. I can't wait to watch him grow up! It's safe to say, I'm in love <3
Carson James Gaskin
7 pounds 1 ounce 20 inches
9:21 am February 1, 2013
Providence Hospital
Mobile, AL
Thursday, October 4, 2012
Earning Money! Woohoo!
No, I didn't go out and get a job. I can assure you that won't be happening anytime real soon, especially now that #2 is well on his way! Have you seen the costs of Daycare these days?! Ridiculous. Anyways... back to earning money.
I always thought that to make money from home you had to sell something like cosmetics or jewelry or handbags... and you had to host parties or go set up a booth... either way, I would fail (and have failed) at these business ventures-simply because I am a TERRIBLE salesperson. I hate asking people to spend money, mostly because I myself hate to be asked to spend money. I thought it was impossible to really just be able to do work online and get paid for it. Not legitimately or legally, anyway. I'm sure most online work-from-home business ventures are a scam... in fact, I know they are! I've looked into them. Thankfully for people like me, though, there are a few legitimate work-from-home opportunities. I stumbled onto one just last week and boy am I excited! It's called MCA.
MCA is the Motor Club of America. It's similar to AAA but with more benefits. I am an Associate with MCA, which means that I go out (or in my case, stay in) and find people that are interested in becoming a MCA member or Associate (like me!). It's SUPER easy: I post FREE ads online in places like Craigslist, Backpage, and Facebook. I also occasionally make a YouTube video to generate more interest. The bottom line: I copy and paste ads into different websites. When people email me that they are interested in the company, I send them more information. When/if they decide to become a member/associate, I get paid $80. Tada! Easy money couldn't be easier. I personally post ads while Jo is eating. It's easy for me to sit at the table with my computer and get my "work" done while she is occupied with her latest meal. I still have PLENTY of time to play with her and clean and cook and take care of all of my other responsibilities. Like I said: EASY!
The way I look at it is this: of course the benefits with MCA are great (Dental/Rx/Vision Discounts, Travel/Hotel Discounts, Stolen Auto Reward, 24 Hour Dispatch Emergency Road Service, Emergency Travel Expense, Travel Itinerary Service, Auto related Legal Assistance, etc.) but what's even better is helping others figure out that there is a way to stay at home and earn money that is TOTALLY do-able! Who can't copy and paste a paragraph or two into a list of websites that is handed to them? Not anybody I know!
Bottom line: I market a product/service. When someone I have recruited signs up, I make $80. When they sign someone up, I make $6. So I also get residual income from my sign-ups (which is GREAT!). I get paid weekly. I get my own website. I don't have to put on real clothes or leave the house. It's a win win in my book! Do you know anybody who could use some extra income? Let me know! I'll be happy to get them started TODAY!
Feeling Blue-in a good way!
Scrolling back through my Facebook posts this morning, I realized that I blogged about what gender this baby would be, but never posted results! Blogger Fail! In the interest of attempting (mostly failing, but still attempting!) to keep up with this blog, here's our latest baby news:
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| You aren't seeing things: It's a BOY!!!! |
Our handsome little finger sucker is looking absolutely perfect. He's very active and easy-going (at least that's my interpretation of his ultrasounds!). I simply cannot wait to meet him. He has been the very easiest pregnancy I could imagine. Hopefully the rest of it goes just as the quickly as it has up to this point!
We feel very blessed to have a perfect princess and now a handsome little man on the way! Adam is (of course) THRILLED that he finally gets his little boy-I can't wait to see him interact with a little man. I can't help but wonder what the differences are going to be! We shall see soon enough!
Now is the time to get busy making all the cute little boy accessories... I feel like there aren't a whole lot of adorable boy things out there so if I pick out fabrics and patterns and do it myself I'm sure to love them!
That's all the news I have for now-Hope ya'll have had a wonderful week so far! "Bye, Ya'll!"
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